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Kii posted a topic in General DiscussionI'm not sure where this belongs, I'll post it here.. Please move it if required. The below is something that I simply have to post here. I can’t ignore it anymore... its nagging at me, lol. In the end, I guess the point of this post is to provide a place for others to chime in or maybe just reflect or compare notes and experiences along these lines that I suspect have long been lingering for many, possibly with more and more urgency as of late. This turned out much longer than I anticipated, sorry! - From Waves to Circles and now... Personal Synchronicities - I’m trying to find the words that describe some things I have been feeling/perceiving lately. Ok not just lately, but that have recently changed. You all know I’m out there, but now it seems that many of us here are all starting to meet up from our own grazing grounds, so to speak, like the spirals of the universe all winding in to the central point. The synchronicities that I spoke of the other day in Shout are still very much on my mind. I feel it’s important to attempt to address the issue here, but frankly I am unable to do so without going back a bit in time. It just doesn't seem complete (not that it is actually a complete account!), without offering some form of reference. I think it's safe to say so many here at CHANI have been aware of the energy 'waves' that have been pulsing thru us, and Earth, since the mid-nineties. Perhaps every 2-5 months or so we could sense a 'pop', a rise, in the energy/frequency/vibration...whatever we each call it I remember when I was first able to talk about it with my longtime house-mates in Seattle. It was such a freeing relief to find validation and then openly communicate on the new levels that we were able to discover together, as if this form of awareness was no longer taboo, no longer too crazy to speak of aloud. For me, these waves, as I have called them, have changed in their nature over the years. Looking back, I can see how their perceived effect has evolved. We each have our own perception of them. Looking back, for me, at first I would notice that something felt different while going about my day. A very vague feeling, but noticeable none the less. Something changed, almost as if there was something added or removed from the world, but it wasn’t a quantifiable 'thing'. Just a sense that something felt changed. This is when I first started to notice time moving a little bit, but was only able to piece that together after a year or two. These went on for years, with the end of this first wave feeling like there was a wind at my back, or acceleration, a pushing... yet I was not able to grasp the implications of that properly until maybe 10 years ago or so, when the second type of waves started… at least for me. The second type was definitely more intense for me. At first there was the emotional component. It’s when I started to feel a whole new level of emotional energy, even after clearing my space and meditation… Affinity, Wholeness, a few of the many components of what we call Love in the English language. It's a word that is weaksauce and way inadequate for me, anyway. Then my Heart began to fill, and then, to begin to burst. I remember sometimes ending up on the couch feeling like this world was breaking my heart, almost literally. The pain, this deep aching sadness of people hurting one another, the freely thrown about venom spitting hatred and violence. The judgment, competition... the control games... all the aspects of ego's that are simply out of control. I used to weep so hard I was unable to really do anything afterwards for a bit. I would close my eyes and try to sleep… looking to the universe like a child, as that was all I had left in me at the moment. Breaking my Heart, Shattering my Ego. I couldn't comprehend that much hate. This is when I relearned I wasn't really from Earth. I was no longer able to function in the world per se', I began my detachment so I could remain sane and be able to do what the day required and find joy and accomplishment in my tasks. Then, the third wave. I think this one was maybe more differentiated for different soul archetypes/oversouls now that I consider it anew. For me, these waves manifested as a strange feeling like I had done something really bad, but yet I hadn't. I have spoken of this here before. A body fear strong enough to make me want to just curl up in a corner and hide. I was also going through a rough patch personally during some of this time, and while I know other folks that also could relate to this level of increased energy in the same basic way as I experienced them, I suspect some others that were in a better place at the time may have had a far better go of them. Dunno. These waves seem to have dissipated about 9 months or so ago, with a new period of awareness and massive intake of information following it. Almost like the answer to prayers, information from all over coming in to start to fill files that had a name but no substantive content yet. It's still going on, but I'm now starting to sense something new. I don’t know if it's a new aspect or just my own growth. It is too early to tell as there is no hindsight now. A little over a week ago I was driving a distance for work and I heard myself/my spirit say 'Here we go, it’s starting'. In this Thought Block, as I now call them, Irealized I had somehow popped a new level in my...something... Awareness/Growth/Perception/Understanding.. all those words seem to be so clichéd and trivial and have no real weight or conveyance of the depth of this realization's scope. In that moment, still driving thru this small town on a Native American reservation, I saw how even if I died at that moment, I had indeed achieved some significant growth and it wouldn’t bother me too much. The tears and joy started in knowing this, the music on the radio seemed perfect for the moment. Everything seemed to just be in the right place at the right moment. A major, major synchronicity. A whole new layer and this one was void of negativity. It was like remembering The Good News, and knowing in another whole new way that we are indeed not just Spirit, but Beings rooted with a vast history and so much love and compassion that I don’t think there are any words on the planet that can even come close. I’m sure there is a symbol or 3 that exist somewhere that represents this, but I don't know what they are here in body, lol That would be the first Synchronicity on this new level for me. The second happened a couple days ago. Again, there was this feeling of 'Here we go..' I wish I could impart more to this than I can, but it is just too new. It is a knowingness that the quiet voice in my head that is me, not anothers thoughts, is speaking to me. And it’s fast too, no conscious trigger thought proceeding it. It just popped in as soon as I gathered myself tight in my body very shortly after awaking in the morning. Its like, instead of the waves pushing me forward with me hanging on tight, now it is like the wagons are beginning to circle around, with each of them bringing with them the documents and notes of information and experiences that have been compiled out in the field. Perhaps now comes the time when so much information and experience comes together, with a pow-wow of my-many-selves and old friends and new compadre's soon to come... Dunno yet, still some road left ahead... but man does it feel like it. So I have to ask myself for a sanity check... Maybe all this is just me and my perceptions of my own personal journey and spiritual unfolding. Maybe I have simply now shared personal things that didnt even need to be said, and perhaps should not have. Maybe I am just weird ol' me and nothing is happening outside my inner little psychosis/skewed reality and imagination. Maybe. I don’t sense any truth in that though. It feels as sterile and devoid of anything that has any life as it gets. So there! I said it. Something is happening. And I'm glad. Something is happening for us and it's getting very close now. It's almost time. But then, we already knew all this here at CHANI anyway ) This place of refuge that Aco prospected and staked out and this community builds upon. And That, fills me with even more peace. A calm, energizing, smiling Joy. And I hope it does for all you too. )) With Care, -Kii